Lock me up

My psychologist (I love her to bits!) has suggested I consider a specialised Eating Disorder inpatient treatment program. I once again had a session where I talked about the tumultuous highs and lows of the past month – there were some lovely positives and some not so lovely sunken depths. Just a standard session really. […]

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Peace

1: a state of tranquility or quiet 2: freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions 3: harmony in personal relations 4: in a state of concord or tranquility Is that how peace feels for you? It sounds pretty good huh?! It is something I’ve rarely experienced for some time. I’ve been afraid to feel […]

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Discomfort

I must be do something right. I’m feeling very uncomfortable. And I’ve been reassured again and again, that change is uncomfortable, so I guess this is change. Whether it’s short or long term change, is yet to be determined. In the meantime – I’m feeling very uncomfortable. I haven’t been writing about my eating disorder […]

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Shame, Shame, Shame

Apparently I’m a shame magnet. Not sure if I struggle with shame because I’m super sensitive to humiliation, or if I’m super sensitive to humiliation because I struggle with shame. I am quite sure that absolutely nobody is comfortable with public humiliation. Are they? Anyone comfortable with humiliation must have a problem – in my […]

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Feed me

Every morsel of food passing my lips is feeding something. This is a universal truth. I am not special. Physical Hunger We all have physical hunger and we all need to feed it. The body needs nourishment in order to function. Feed it badly, it will treat you badly. Feed it well and you’re on […]

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Tipping Points

I’m always intrigued at how people find recovery – from anything. What is the tipping point for someone to make lasting change? For them to really dig in and do the hard yards and to stop just thinking about it. I’d share my own wisdom on this topic with all of you, however I don’t […]

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Not broken. Stuck

I’ve started a course in Acceptance & Commitment Therapy, and while I’m very early in the process (half way through week one 😀 ) I have already found a lovely little snippet that really resonated with me. And I mean REALLY resonated! I’m not broken. I’m stuck. How simple is that?! After completely falling apart, […]

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Rebirth

I fell off the radar because to be honest, I’m struggling to visit here as I’m not sure it’s doing me a great favour. When I think about my blog – and most of what I write in it – I think about mental health issues and food obsessions. Writing has been very cathartic and helpful […]

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Under the influence

I’m floppy. I woke with a sore neck and throbbing head at 4am, gave in and took drugs at 1:30pm. Now I have no pain but should avoid driving motor vehicles and operating heavy machinery. I hope writing is not considered heavy machinery. I like to think that while under the influence, my creative juices […]

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Reframing Relapse

As I mentioned in my previous post, I’ve slipped into a period of relapse. I can sit and analyse the how and why until the cows home, but it doesn’t make any difference to the result. That’s the problem with mental health issues – it’s essential to look back and understand how we got here, […]

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Letting Go & Giving Up

What’s the difference? One and the same? The end result is the same. I’ve been visiting a physio for some time now – to try and nut out the origins of the pain in my back. I started seeing her after I’d seen an osteopath. I started seeing the osteopath after the chiropractor. I started […]

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I’m a peculiar little person

A friend asked today, How are you? Now this friend is not someone I bother saying, I’m fine to, because she knows better than to listen to that bullshit. Our journeys have crossed paths on more than one occasion and she gets it. But I didn’t really know what to say, because I kind of AM fine. But […]

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