Under the influence

I’m floppy. I woke with a sore neck and throbbing head at 4am, gave in and took drugs at 1:30pm. Now I have no pain but should avoid driving motor vehicles and operating heavy machinery. I hope writing is not considered heavy machinery. I like to think that while under the influence, my creative juices […]

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Reframing Relapse

As I mentioned in my previous post, I’ve slipped into a period of relapse. I can sit and analyse the how and why until the cows home, but it doesn’t make any difference to the result. That’s the problem with mental health issues – it’s essential to look back and understand how we got here, […]

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Now I lay me down to sleep…

This little girl is on the wall next to my bed. My Nanna made it when I was little. I love it. For years it was tucked away in the back of a cupboard, the copper dark and green, the gloss disappearing from the embossed nightgown. A couple of years ago it magically appeared in […]

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I’m a peculiar little person

A friend asked today, How are you? Now this friend is not someone I bother saying, I’m fine to, because she knows better than to listen to that bullshit. Our journeys have crossed paths on more than one occasion and she gets it. But I didn’t really know what to say, because I kind of AM fine. But […]

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Banded

In April 2012 I was 46 years old. I’d battled weight my entire life and I was tired. All the weight I’d previously lost was back on – again. All the tricks I’d used before were failing. I tried eating less, exercising more, eating more, exercising less. Shakes and weird shit and anything I could […]

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Restricted

I’ve always considered myself an overeater. A binger. Food addict. Pig. Someone with no control over what I ate and destined to spend a life battling an obsession with body image and food. I have sought resources for eating disorder recovery for a decade. And as time went on, my seeking became more desperate and […]

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Cheer Up, Buttercup

Are you sick to death of hearing about depression? How sad we all are now? It’s an epidemic apparently… I know I’m sick to death of hearing about it – not because I lack compassion for those with depression, but because I AM one of those people with depression. Apparently. And how depressing is that?! […]

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