Day Three

I made it to the clinic and apparently I’m settling in. Well – lots of people ask me every day how I’m settling in. What do you say to that? I’m here and I’m following the rules. I’d rather be at home cleaning my toilets but I’m not. So here we are. My world has […]

Read More Day Three

And it’s time…

In 12 hours, I’m heading off to the clinic. I think I know what to expect, but I also know I have no idea. Does that sound confusing? Of course it does. Life is confusing. Whatever preconceptions and expectations I’ve managed to construct for myself over the past few weeks, tomorrow will be the day […]

Read More And it’s time…

Visionary

I wasn’t going to blog tonight, but I’m feeling just a teensy bit chirpy and chuffed so I thought I would share. I am a master procrastinator. Yes. It’s true. When I want to do something, or necessity dictates I have to get off my butt right now, I’m an amazing gogetter. But when I’m […]

Read More Visionary

Dream Writing

Today I did some dream writing. It was a technique I learned through Joanne when I did her Seven Day Challenge. I was super teary and tired when I started the day today. It’s been a bit of a rough road but you know – that’s life. These things happen. It’ll be fine. I knew I […]

Read More Dream Writing

Melancholy

I’m consumed with sadness today. I know it’s the stupid drug, but fuck it’s annoying. On the upside, the psychiatrist rang and said to wean myself off and I’m being admitted into the inpatient eating disorder unit instead. It’s a strange world where that seems like a good thing – right? This drug has really […]

Read More Melancholy

Welcome to the New Year

I used to be gung ho about making New Years’ resolutions – now I know better. I am old and wise. But that is not to say this is not a good time to reflect on the year that has been and put behind me those moments I never wish to see again. We all […]

Read More Welcome to the New Year

Hopeless

Aside from going on a cruise and having all my pubic hair ripped out in large patches, there have been a few other firsts in my life recently. I was bitten by a wasp last week on Mystery Island. I’ve never been bitten by a wasp anywhere before. Not anywhere geographically – or physically. So this was […]

Read More Hopeless

The essence of life

I recently read a little about Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs. It’s interesting – have a bit of a look if you have the time. And the inclination. The essence of our lives can be broken down into five fundamental human needs, and the most basic are of course physiological. We all know that. air, food, […]

Read More The essence of life

Lock me up

My psychologist (I love her to bits!) has suggested I consider a specialised Eating Disorder inpatient treatment program. I once again had a session where I talked about the tumultuous highs and lows of the past month – there were some lovely positives and some not so lovely sunken depths. Just a standard session really. […]

Read More Lock me up

Sad Sack of Sorry

I’m feeling a little sore, sad and sorry for myself. Sore, because I fell off a fit ball a few weeks back and undid all the good work from my previous cortisone injection into the facet joints of my lower vertebrae – so today I had a repeat injection. Fingers crossed it works just as […]

Read More Sad Sack of Sorry

Peace

1: a state of tranquility or quiet 2: freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions 3: harmony in personal relations 4: in a state of concord or tranquility Is that how peace feels for you? It sounds pretty good huh?! It is something I’ve rarely experienced for some time. I’ve been afraid to feel […]

Read More Peace

Discomfort

I must be do something right. I’m feeling very uncomfortable. And I’ve been reassured again and again, that change is uncomfortable, so I guess this is change. Whether it’s short or long term change, is yet to be determined. In the meantime – I’m feeling very uncomfortable. I haven’t been writing about my eating disorder […]

Read More Discomfort