Have I got your attention now? [Apologies to my offspring. If you don’t want to suffer through details of your parents’ sex lives, probably best you stop reading now.] Orgasm … Continue reading Orgasm
Aside from Mental Health concerns, I occasionally write about “normal” health issues that arise for me. Although I’m very fortunate to basically have outstanding health most of the time.
I can hear the inside of my head. There’s a low pulsing hum, pitched at G below middle C (196 Hz). And a high pitched wash of chitter chatter, like … Continue reading The day after
It’s easy to know when your body needs food – physical cues are given out. We all know what they are (even when some of use choose to ignore those … Continue reading Feeding Time
Day 43 Forty three days down. Nine to go. I am ready – but glad to have these last nine days to consolidate what I’ve learned, set up support at … Continue reading Week Seven
Day 36 Hmm… What to write today? The easier things become at the clinic, and the more confidence I develop in my ability to recover – and stay recovered – … Continue reading Week Six
I must be do something right. I’m feeling very uncomfortable. And I’ve been reassured again and again, that change is uncomfortable, so I guess this is change. Whether it’s short … Continue reading Discomfort
Every morsel of food passing my lips is feeding something. This is a universal truth. I am not special. Physical Hunger We all have physical hunger and we all need … Continue reading Feed me
Relax! Huh?! People keep telling me to relax, take a bit of time out, chill! My massage therapist flops my arm around telling me to relax it. I barely know what … Continue reading An unnatural state
My fatigue is back. It went away for a while. I didn’t miss it. Good riddance, I thought. Then it came back. For fuck’s sake, I thought… Now I can barely struggle … Continue reading Finding strength for recovery through fatigue
I may not be a dog person, but I am acutely aware of the joy, love and hope a beloved pet can bring. During the worst of my depression last year, … Continue reading For the love of a cat…
I have Restless Legs Syndrome.
I rarely talk about it. It sounds like a benign and trivial condition everyone experiences at some stage. To some extent that is true, but my restless legs are severe and chronic.
And normally extremely well managed.
Like most problems, there are people who have it much worse. While I have a lot of associated nerve pain, if I take regular medication it’s fine. I rarely notice it and when I do it’s not too bad. In that aspect of my life, I found a little pocket of normality.
Today I want to sleep.
I want to go to sleep and never wake up. To luxuriate in the endless bliss of nothingness. I want to be free from physical pain. Free from exhaustion. I don’t want to feel worried or anxious or guilty or afraid. I don’t want to be fat and old and lost and weary. I just want to rest. To slip into eternal, blissful rest.