I don’t have anything interesting or noteworthy to say today, but in the interests of my ongoing recovery, I am making a public accountability statement.
I ate more food than I was comfortable with today.
I ate different food and at different times to my prescribed meal plan times.
I feel uncomfortably full. Probably an 8 or 9 on the good old satiety scale.
I am struggling big time with eating disorder thoughts, wanting to compensate for this Sunday indulgence – either by purging tonight, or restricting tomorrow. And by wanting to punish myself with self harm for my weakness and stupidity.
As I now consider myself to be a person “in” recovery, I will do none of those things. I will simply make this public announcement of my fallibility, have a glass of water with my normal evening medications, and put it all behind me. When I wake tomorrow, I will have my normal breakfast at the normal time and I will endeavour to have a normal day. Because that is what normal people do. They occasionally overeat and then they forget about it. Apparently…