Today I reached out to friends near and far, asking for good thoughts, prayers, and pixie dust – depending on individual leanings. I am eternally grateful for the thoughts, prayers and pixie dust that were sent skyward bound, into the heavens…
Today one of my children faced the legal consequences of making stupid decisions as a young adult. The result could have been devastating – he could have gone to prison. The outcome was the best possible scenario. I am still flabbergasted… He has been blessed with a second chance I desperately hope he takes full advantage of.
When that fat little roly poly bundle of joy was placed into my arms two decades ago, never did I imagine I would one day be describing this beautiful boy to a magistrate, in the hope of offering insight and background for an otherwise amazing young person.
At just a year and a half old, he sat his chubby little legs on my great aunt’s knees, looked up at her with his bright blue eyes and golden curls, and said, “I’s the boss.” It’s true. He has always been the boss. He’s always been hard to tame. I’ve always adored him – his spirit, his generosity, his love. I feel a great connection and understanding with him – even if I am from time to time, disappointed with his poor decision making.
Today I shared the following with the learned men of the law:
He is a highly intelligent, fiercely independent, loyal, creative, fearless and compassionate young man. These character traits have frequently stood him in good stead, but have also led him astray as evidenced by the matters before you.
While he has shown a lapse in maturity and moral fortitude, he has also shown great maturity over the years and a very strong sense of moral fibre. He is known for looking after those who can’t always look after themselves. He assisted my mother and grandmother when they were very ill and when I was hospitalised for several weeks, he spent hours with me on many occasions just to keep me company, for which I am incredibly proud and grateful.
It is my hope he applies his prodigious intellectual and creative talents to endeavours that will benefit society, and that this period of his life results in a permanent lesson but one that does not cause a permanent downturn to his promising young life.
As I sat in the back of the courtroom today, my heart was breaking. He is ALL these things and so much more. Sure, as the magistrate said, he has earned a PhD in stupidity, but he also has the capacity to learn and to never make the same mistakes again.
I sat there for almost an hour, listening to proceedings, watching his back. I could see the strain upon his sagging shoulders, the stress in his red-rimmed eyes, and the fear in his shaking hands. He is simultaneously really strong and incredibly fragile . He may have always learned lessons the hard way, but sometimes lessons can be too hard – then he breaks.
Today I was helpless and hopeless. I tried calming my own anxieties by silently chanting the serenity prayer, begging for strength and love from my mother and sister, and endlessly repeating this too shall pass. I couldn’t reach out and touch him. Couldn’t calm his nerves or tell him it would all be okay – no matter what the outcome. Couldn’t hug him and look him in the eye. All I could do was silently send my eternal love out – to wrap him in warmth and comfort from afar. To imagine my arms wrapped around his strong young frame, and maternal love protecting his heart. To wrap him up with everything I have and hope that leniency was offered.
Strong lessons were learned today. His new housemate sent a message saying he had a day to move out – just 48 hours after he moved in. Then the magistrate gave him a tongue lashing, followed by sentencing – that includes no conviction will be recorded. This is a miracle. He has been given a second chance. A second chance to reflect upon the consequences of foolhardy decisions. A second chance to finish his tertiary education and to go on to the career of his dreams. A second chance to travel the world if he so desires. A second chance to fulfill all his incredible potential in life.
With thanks to the good thoughts, prayers and pixie dust that were so generously offered by so many people, my highly intelligent, fiercely independent, loyal, creative, fearless and compassionate boy, has been given a second chance. I can only but hope he realises how incredibly fortunate he is. I can only but hope he realises how much I love him.